The Fighting Flat-Topped Fat Ass

"an academic unit dedicated to the ideals of excellence and independent thinking...
to teach those disciplined habits of mind, body and spirit that characterize educated, skilled and free human beings." -ND student athlete mission.

When comparing student athletes, Notre Dame prides itself on the conviction of the youngsters that enroll. I decided to celebrate in the strong moral fortitude shown by ND student athletes by recognizing two such individuals...


Nothing says strong moral conviction by celebrating a 23-7 loss to Michigan State like partying all night and driving on sidewalks. In all 37, fine educated, skilled and free human beings were arrested for celebrating the ass kicking MSU handed to the Irish. Why leave it all on the field when you can stay up all night celebrating the storied institution.

Police say however one got away from the party. The only description given was that it looked like a minivan on legs. They were able to follow the suspect several blocks by a trail of chicken wing bones that was left behind. The trail went cold however outside of the local KFC.